A form of marriage has been known to exist in all human societies, past and present. Its distinction can be seen in the ornate and intricate laws and rituals surrounding it. Although these laws and rituals are as different and abundant as human social and cultural organizations, some universals do apply.
The principal legal function of marriage is to ensure the rights of the partners with respect to each other and to assure the rights and define the relationships of children within a community. Marriage has empirically conferred a legal status on the offspring, which entitled him or her to the various privileges assured by the culture of that community, including the right of inheritance. In most societies marriage also established the permissible social interaction allowed to the offspring, including the adequate selection of future spouses.
Until the late 20th century, marriage was almost never a matter of free choice. In Western societies love between partners came to be associated with marriage, but even in Western society (as the novels of writers such as Henry James and Edith Wharton attest) romantic love was not the primary purpose for matrimony in most eras, and one’s marriage partner was carefully considered.
Endogamy, the routine of marrying someone from within one’s own tribe or group, is the oldest social regulation of marriage. When the methods of communication with outside groups are restrictive, endogamous marriage is a natural conclusion. Cultural influences to marry within one’s social, economic, and ethnic group are still very strongly policed in some societies.
Exogamy, the customof marrying outside the group, is found in societies in which kinship partnerships are the most complex, thus barring from marriage large groups who may trace their lineage to a common ancestor.
In societies in which the large, or extended, family remains the basic unit, marriages are usually arranged by the family. The assumption is that love between the partners comes after marriage, and much thought is given to the socioeconomic advantages given to the larger family from the match. By contrast, in societies in which the small, or nuclear, family predominates, young adults usually choose their own mates. It is assumed that love precedes (and determines) marriage, and less thought is normally given to the socioeconomic aspects of the match.
In societies with arranged marriages, the almost universal custom is that a person acts as an intermediary, or matchmaker. This person’s chiefresponsibility is to arrange a marriage that will be agreeable to the two families represented. A form of dowry or bridewealth is almost always exchanged in societies that favour arranged marriages.
In societies in which individuals choose their own mates, dating is the usual way for people to meet and become acquainted with prospective partners. Successful dating may result in courtship, which then usually leads to marriage.
Marriage rituals
The rituals and ceremonies for marriage in the majority of cultures are associated primarily with fertility and confirm the distinction of marriage for the continuation of a clan, people, or society. They also assert a familial or communal sanction of the mutual choice and a comprehension of the difficulties and sacrifices involved in making what is considered, in most cases, to be a lifelong commitment to and responsibility for the welfare of spouse and children.
Marriage ceremonies include symbolic rites, often sanctified by a religious order, which are considered to confer good fortune on the couple. Because economic considerations play a crucial role in the success of child rearing, the presentation of gifts, both real and symbolic, to the married couple are a meaningful part of the marriage ritual. When the presentation of prevents is extensive, either from the bride’s family to the bridegroom’s or vice versa, this usually signifies that the ability to choose one’s marital partner has been limited and announced by the families of the betrothed.
Fertility rites with the intention to ensure a fruitful marriage exist in some form in all ceremonies. Some of the oldest rituals still to exist in contemporary ceremonies include the conspicuous display of fruits or of cereal grains that may be sprinkled over the couple or on their nuptial bed, the accompaniment of a small child with the bride, and the smashing of an object or food to ensure a successful consummation of the marriage and an easy childbirth.
The most universal ritual is one that symbolizes a sacred union. This may be expressed by the joining of hands, an exchange of rings or chains, or the tying of garments. However, all the elements in marriage rituals vary greatly among different societies, and components such as time, place, and the social importance of the event are fixed by tradition and habit.
These traditions are, to a certain extent, formed by the religious beliefs and practices found in societies throughout the world. In the Hindu tradition, for example, weddings are highly elaborate affairs, involving several prescribed rituals. Marriages are usually arranged by the parents of the couple, and the time of the ceremony is determined by careful astrological calculations. Among the majority of Buddhists marriage remains primarily a secular affair, even though the Buddha offered guidelines for the responsibilities of lay householders.
In Judaism marriage is thought to have been established by God and is described as making the individual complete. Marriage involves a double ceremony, which includes the formal betrothal and wedding rites (prior to the 12th century the two were separated by as much as one year). The modern ceremony begins with the groom signing the marriage contract before a group of witnesses. He is then led to the bride’s room, where he lays a veil on her. This is followed by the ceremony under the huppa (a canopy that symbolizes the bridal bower), which includes the reading of the marriage contract, the seven marriage benedictions, the groom’s placing a ring on the bride’s finger (in Conservative and Reform traditions the double ring ceremony has been introduced), and, in most communities, the crushing of a glass under foot. After the ceremony the couple is led into a private room for seclusion, which symbolizes the consummation of the marriage.
From its beginnings, Christianity has emphasized the spiritual nature and indissolubility of marriage. Jesus Christ spoke of marriage as being instituted by God, and most Christians consider it a unbreakable union based upon mutual consent. Some Christian churches consider marriage as one of the sacraments, and other Christians confirm the sanctity of marriage but do not consider it as a sacrament. Since the Middle Ages, Christian weddings have taken place before a priest or minister, and the ceremony involves the exchange of vows, readings from Scripture, a blessing, and, sometimes, the eucharistic rite.
In Islam marriage is not rigidly a sacrament but is always understood as a gift from God or a kind of service to God. The basic Islamic tenets concerning marriage are laid out in the Qur’an, which states that the marital bond rests on “mutual love and mercy,” and that spouses are “each other’s garments.” Muslim men are allowed to have up to four wives at one time (though they seldom do), but the wives must all be treated equitably. Marriages are traditionally contracted by the father or guardian of the bride and her intended husband, who must offer his bride the mahr, a payment offered as a gift to guarantee her financial independence.
If you are looking for a Cairns wedding celebrant, a wedding celebrant in Cairns or a Cairns civil celebrant, contact Del at sharingandcaringcairns.com.au
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